I have a call in to my PDOC. I hope he listens when he gets in. I told him I am suicidal. My bags are still packed from yesterday.
When I made the appointment with the grief counselor, I involved my husband.
I just assumed he was going. He flew into a rage when I told him he was included in the appointment. He says he doesn't need anyone. It is obvious to me he does. I feel my sons death is my fault. He says it isn't but the way he is treating me tells me he is blaming me.
This is so f...Ed up . I said if I lost my son in the summer when he had a close call, there was no doubt about it there would be no reason to live.
I told my husband I would not leave him alone when Jason died. But I don't think he really cares if I live or die.
I took a 25 mg seroquel it is helping a little bit.