This is often the kind of challenges people have when they struggle with PTSD. These low feelings come an go, especially on aniversaries. I have this myself, but I remind myself that it is part of the PTSD and that I have to make sure I don't "feed into it".

I hope you are working with a therapist on this, letting out your feelings but also have the goal to "heal" inspite of your bad life experience. PTSD can leave a person feeling like they don't know what they want anymore, lost and confused. It is good to "try" to engage yourself again, maybe it isn't such a bad idea to consider going back to work again. You might be surprised at how that can actually "help" you "recover better" even though you feel the "doubts" you have been feeling.

Keep thinking of whatever positves you can, it is not good to devote too much time to replaying the "bad" or "perceived damage" in your mind.

(((Hugs)))
Open Eyes