Since I began struggling with PTSD, my view of other people has changed alot. There were so many times when I was struggling so much with it that someone elses "genuine" efforts to offer advice to me felt like they were "invalidating" me instead.
I became "very sensitive" to how people "reacted" to me and it took me a while to work through that part of the PTSD.

I found it very challenging because there were times when I just "needed to be angry" or even be sad or have some "down time" away from being "stimulated" by other's. I have had too many times in my life where I was "disrespected" or "profoundly hurt" by the actions of others and then told to "get over it, it is in the past". So, anytime I hear "anything" that dismisses my feelings, I tend to get very angry. It has taken me time to work on that, recognize it, and try to not let it trigger me so much.

Now, I try to pay attention to how I am feeling and "what I would like someone else to say to me" that I feel would "help me more". There "is" a fine line between validating someone's anger and giving that person more "fuel to be even more angry" or depressed.

When we make an effort to "try to reach out" we will always "risk" being somehow "rejected" by other people. As I have come to understand "my disorder" and work through it, part of that includes realizing that people can only "give what they know" and that even though I don't get what "I" need, I have to at least see the limits of others.

We are all so unique really that it can be difficult to truely "know the genuine needs of another person". It is important to establish our own boundaries and understand that if we are beginning to "disregard" our own feelings and needs, it is time to realize we need to distance from the other person.

We cannot "fix" other people, all we can do is offer our "help" as best as we can to encourage them to "fix" themselves. I try my best to listen, and validate the other person's feelings. I am never going to be perfect and have the answers for everyone, I try my best, but I am only human and will have times when another person may not be at a point where they are ready to "not be angry" or "depressed" yet.

Open Eyes