Dear, those voices are LYING to you! Jesus would NEVER ask you or try to kick you out of your church! And how do you know that you can't do what He wants you to do? All He asks us to do is to be faithful, and not to sin. I have a feeling you're already doing that.

The DEVIL is trying to make you take drugs again. DON'T DO IT. And suicide is also the devil talking. Plus it is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. So please don't even think about that. We'll be here to help and so will your therapist.

God bless you my friend. Big hugs, Lee