Sannah thank you for your responce. I've noticed several times before but forgot to ask ant the bottom of your little box it says i'm an ISFJ, that's a new one to me. What might that mean.

I do feel guilty about complaining. When me and my H are together sthiings seem great, when it is just me I seem to be either falling apart or complaining. I think my H is on his good behavior when he knows we will have T together the next week. He can let his guard down a little and be the typical pain that he is when it is my turn to see the T.