I've been really "stable" for the last few months thanks to my friends Zyprexa, Prozac, and Wellbutrin. I am a college student in the US, and this semester I am studying abroad in Italy. I left about two weeks ago.

I knew before I left that this trip would challenge my stability. Last time I went to Europe, I went from mildly depressed to very hypomanic within a day due to the fact that my sleep schedule was disturbed. On that trip, I was with people that I knew, and was only planning on staying for a week.

This time, in addition to the initially interrupted sleep schedule and time difference, I have the following stressors:

-leaving my friends and family behind in the US
- knowing that I won't be going home for months
-having to live with people I barely know
-spending an extended period of time in a place where I don't know the language
-studying at a new university

Within the past two weeks I have been having intense mood swings (usually between elation and anger/irritability, but occasionally some depression). I wasn't too concerned about it, but last night I was thinking about my best friend whom I'm romantically attracted to (see the "how to get over her" thread for more details), and the possibility that our friendship doesn't mean anything to her. This heavily impacted my mood, to the point where I thought about sui seriously for the first time in months.

I know that it is ridiculous. So some girl doesn't like me as much as I like her; it's hardly a reason to kill myself. But the impulse was there. I also have a huge hoard of drugs, 120 days worth of all my meds, so if I wanted to overdose, I easily could.

How concerned should I be about these mood swings; could they be dangerous? And what can I do to minimize their effects on my wellbeing? I'm already seeing a therapist through my Italian university; I thought it would be a good idea to help me adjust. Should I tell her about my (now passed) sui impulse? I don't want to seem melodramatic. I'm frankly ashamed that something so minor would have elicited such a reaction from me...

Thanks!