Why did you say you're infatuated at all? Doesn't sound like infatuation whatsoever, sounds like pure jealousy and obsessiveness. To wish pain on someone or mishaps and enjoying the idea to make you feel better about yourself is just bordering on sadistic thoughts. In my mind you can't be infatuated with someone while wishing they were hurt or messed up in any way. On top of that you're dreamiing of actually causing her harm by robbing her? Sounds more like anger at her than anything.