I struggled for a long time with T being nice to me or offering me compliments. I'm getting better about accepting that, but it's still hard. For me, it boils down to two things. 1. I HATE having attention drawn to me, because in the past, it meant that something bad might happen. If I'm in the spotlight, that means I'm being noticed, and if I'm being noticed, then that opens me up to ridicule and abuse. 2. I didn't (and still don't, sometimes) believe the compliments or that I deserved to be treated nicely. Because of experiences and my own view of my self worth, I always added "if only's" to the end of any compliment...even if T was being totally genuine. I have finally learned to just take what T says at face value. She doesn't put hidden meanings in her words, she doesn't do passive-aggressive. If T would say "your hair looks nice today" I would add on 'if only you'd get it cut shorter' in my head. Now, I just accept that T thinks my hair looks nice.