You can start a new thread, or you can continue building on this one. Either way is fine, just whatever is more comfortable for you.

You can also use private messages (PMs) to send messages to individual members. They're basically like PC emails.

I'm sorry that getting help is a little out of reach for you right now. If you don't mind my asking, how old are you? You might still have some things available to you to help you. I really like the idea of trying to bring more positive thoughts into your life. That's kind of the basis of some therapy. To "rewire" your brain away from negative thoughts. My T explained it to me like this:

Think of your brain as a field of tall grass. You take a certain path and you trod down the grass, and eventually create a very visible, easy to walk path. These are you negative thoughts, actions, etc. So what we have to do is create new paths. You'll want to slip back into the old paths because they're well worn. But you have to work to create new paths. And each time you do a little change, like thinking something positive, or getting out of bed, you're working on creating a new, positive path.

I found her description pretty helpful. And if I'm having a bad day, I try to remember it and force myself to get out of bed. Granted, it doesn't always work...

And while you can't get therapy right now, you can keep trying to make positive changes in your life that will help fight the depression. Not just in thoughts, but actions too. Work towards eating better, getting on a sleep schedule that works for you, and any exercise you can. I know this is all much easier said than done. MUCH easier. But just try to take it one day at a time and don't get too overwhelmed. Reward yourself when you do something positive, but don't' beat yourself up when you don't. Be gentle with yourself.

But definitely keep talking to us here. Like someone said, if we thought we were wasting our time with your post, we wouldn't have responded or even bothered to read it.