If someone came around like a friend or boyfriend or something do you think you could feel love again? I bet you could. In fact I'm pretty sure of it. The problem is that they would be your only source of "love". I will use the word "happiness" instead of the word love usually because the word love is thrown around a lot. Love is being there for your girlfriend and holding her hair back while she blows chunks in the toilet. And lets face it - no one feels that way about anyone at first sight. Sorry to all the hopeless romantics out there.

So lets start with happiness because love is complicated. If you want happiness you can get it from friends, boyfriends/girlfriends, cars, money, e.t.c; In fact, lets create a hypothetical situation and say that you could have these right now. Let's say that you have all these things. Just do it... Ok so you have all these things and you see yourself being happy or whatever.

But lets say that bad luck comes around. And I am sure we have all seen bad luck come around. But let's say that you have some especially bad luck. Let's say that you and your boyfriend break up because you have an argument. These things happen to everyone. And then your bank account gets frozen because bad guys from an unknown land have been using it so the government has to "borrow" your money until it all gets settled. Oh and then someone steals your cars. Now you have lost all these great things that you had and with it your happiness went too. Do you see the typical problem with this approach? When your "primary" source of happiness or even love comes from external things and something happens that causes you to lose these things you will no longer be happy. It is therefore in my opinion then that finding happiness primarily in things that are external and are not permanent can only lead to unhappiness. The highs will be high but only the lows will linger on.

It is more important then to find happiness or love in something or someone that will always be around first. And who will always be there for you no matter what happens?

You.

Even now you are posting on an internet forum to vent your feelings.

Sure you can meet some people that feel that same way about you. That would be a beautiful thing. But at the end of the day when no one else is there you will always have you. That is why everyone is worried about your signature. You are hating yourself when you need yourself now more than ever. That brings me to the danger of finding a primary source of "love" only from other people - betrayal. Sometimes even people you trust will wrong you. Sometimes it is purposefully done and sometimes it is an accident. But when your only source of love comes from this person that you trusted it can be very easy to blame yourself for being wronged. Why is this so easy? Because if you don't love yourself then you will only think that you were wrong instead of questioning the other person's behaviour instead. In fact it may not even cross your mind that the fault is with the other person because you simply won't be in that state of mind. I'm sure everyone has been there...

I'm not saying that you should never look for love from other places because you can find great things in the world. But your primary source of happiness and love has to start coming from you. This is important not only for your health - it keeps you safer from people that would try to hurt you as well. I'm not saying that you're going to be invincible when someone wrongs you. You'll probably get angry and feel hurt anyway but you will be a lot better off if you have some love for yourself.

Your signature is just going to make that task harder by making you feel worse about yourself.