(((((((((( WW ))))))))))))))

It's wild that you brought this up. My aunt was just "reviewed" by a p'doc for the state (SSDI stuff), and he said, "You're very injured from your childhood. You will get worse as you get older. Is it your parents fault? Yes and No. Back then people were either sane or insane and since they weren't insane, they were fine. They didn't mean to hurt you. They knew no better."

I disagree mostly, but not all. Yes, the times were different. There weren't the awareness then of things we now know to be so damaging. HOWEVER, the average person should know if they're hurting an innocent. For example, during what time in this world's history is it OK to wish horrible things about another (especially a child) and to verbalize it? I won't go into detail due to the triggering nature. Would that same parent have said that to a friend, another adult standing up for themselves? If not, then it seems to me it was known as inappropriate/wrong. If those actions were to all people, then it would appear to me that it really couldn't be helped. I saw just the children getting the ugly.

After saying all of that, my aunt did not grow to physically abuse her children, but the emotional/mental abuse she inflicted was at times horrific. My cousin is so damaged...all of her children are...all six of them. She did break some cycles, and seemed to "perfect" others.

Sorry, I got off track...back to the orginal topic...I think that statement can have some understanding and is an individual understanding for most when combining all aspects. In my family I see the "trail" and while I have realized that there were some things that are now understood as doing the best for the time, there are others that I know within me will never be OK for any time.

I applaud you for coming to your own understanding and respect it. I also know that others must come to their own understandings through their journeys in healing as healing is very individualized, I think.

KD