I speak as a child who watched her mother be abused for 9 years. You need to get out for the sake of your children. I know easier said than done. I can almost tell you why you won't leave he has probably broke you down so much that you think no one will love you but him. He has made you feel worthless and like a bad mom. Trust me though none of that is true. You have to find the right moment to leave. Does he work? If so when he goes to work take your kids and run. 8 hours is enough time to get away from him.