Thanks Tanya

Wisewoman - where I come from they didn't have resourses to those kinds of things that this 80 year old woman probably had access to. For example where I was raised it was country setting. not the country settings that you see now but mountain country. Where I lived and was raised you had to drive an hour to be at any thing that would fit todays standards of a shopping center. We had one country store in my town where you could buy the basic milk and bread. Alot of the people in the towm worked in the mining business. Most of the adults if not all of them in the area were educated at a K-12 school for the two neighboring towns. In fact many of the adults taught a the school.Even now the school has the people I grew up with teaching and working at the school. Where I was raised Everyone knows everyone, blink and you miss it type of town up in the middle of a mountain range. From time to time I say I was a country girl. Well thats putting my towns and my life mildly. The highight of the town was when the school kids put on musicals programs at the school and the summer clambake. In my town it was the normal so much so that some of the teachers and the principal had paddles and rullers that they used even during my raising.

What is normal for one community and group of people is not always the normal for another and yea thinking back now as an adult I know that some of the situations went too far but for where I was raised those situations were the normal parenting styles passed down through generations because that was all they knew and had access to until the school started hiring people from outside our town and nearest town communities. All the students loved it when a few teachers from an hours drive away were hired but because they tried to bring new things into the teaching and would not conform their teaching styles to the generational type teaching the two were basically backed against the wall so bad that they ended up quitting.

I can see where you are having a problem with parenting syles. I uderstand what you are going through and I'm sorry you are going through this. but I also understand that for my mom the way I was raised is considered abusive by todays standards but back then with what she had available to her she did the best that she could. take care.