I am 19, and i have a few curiosity's that have peaked my interest. these are dangerous sexual acts with a willing consensual partner. i like to be hit, beaten as if i was deserving of it. I lit to be choked to the point where the capalaries in my face burst and i have red freckles everywhere and bruises on my neck. I have rape fantasies, and often like to be cut or in forced submission. I like my hair pulled, i like to be hit, punched, choked, smothered with a pillow, smacked, and cut. at my age it can get dangerously bizarre as i grow more curious. at times i wish my partner would actually kill me. not all of it gets me off but more out of curiosity. i like to be smothered and choked as if i was unworthy. any advice?