I have struggled with major depressive disorder since my early adolescence. The older I get the better I get at coping.
I exercise, eat well (for the most part), do yoga, and meditate. I try to read often, stay close to my friends (who often save my life). Relax. Be with nature. I try very hard to be healthy in my body and mind to manage my depression.

I've taken medications before, it was long ago but from what I remember they worked (lexapro). But overall I want to go without psych medications.

My biggest struggle is the episodic nature of this illness. Yes, we know that it will eventually end; the clouds will part and we will feel normal again. But we can also guarantee that another episode is lurking around the corner. I sometimes become obsessive with maintaining balance in my life just to stave off another desperate episode.

I wonder if my illness will forever be a burden on the one's I love. If I'm doomed to periods of utter withdrawal and isolation.

Eh, I'm not feeling entirely articulate tonight. But it warms my heart to see a supportive network of people here. Often when your depressed, the best thing is to have someone listen, not try to make it better, just accept you for where you're at.

Sending love to all those who suffer