The first exercise you can start doing on your own while looking for a T is practicing being polite. Politeness is not a waste of time. By far. You are not going to get anywhere in life without politeness. Politeness is the glue that hold civilized societies together. And it is not that you do not know how to be polite. You do! In the preface to your long post, you apologized to us for its length. Well that was the right thing to do! So you have the skill. Use it. First, use it with the barista or whoever serves you. With random people with whom it would be easier. Ultimately, with your wife. Start cleaning without making her ask for it. Husbands who clean without beiing asked are priceless. Your chances will improve dramatically if you do this single item, consistently cleaning without being asked.