Hi Roadie,
I'm sorry I didn't respond to your post sooner, I appreciate your insight. I can definitely see why you might think I have assumed the role of victim; what you must also take into account is that, apart from this website, I have no one else to talk to about my problems. Therefore, I sort of spill all my feelings and emotions out here, probably with a bit too much intensity. Actually, though, I really hate feeling like a victim - that's why, during the day, I push all my thoughts and feeling away, because a) I want to feel self-reliant and strong, and b) thinking about my past makes me feel awful. It's probably the fact that I keep everything so bottled up most of the time, that makes my threads sound more like over-emotional outbursts, but I can assure you that most people probably don't see me that way... if they see me at all. Thanks for the advice though, and again, thanks for caring enough to post something, because I was really freaked out over this.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Roadie
Because of the seriousness of your question, I've gone back & reed through you're earlier posts to get as complete a picture as I can of who you are. Unless you've changed greatly over the course of your time here at PsychCentral I don't see someone who is brutish and possibly a sociopath. You're certainly not a "people person" ... that goes without saying ...
You've been bullied, abused , and you've (I think) perhaps assumed the role of victim. Had you gotten the right kind of help, maybe you wouldn't have ended up feeling like a misfit. I think it's understandable that you don't like society and people in general, having been treated so horribly when you've tried to interact.
But I think it's as a misfit that you're responding, not a sociopath. You're angry, hateful even. I feel the same way in some contexts. I think you could talk to a gook therapist and come to understand these feelings, but maybe not change them a lot with more work. What do you want to do?
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