Dr.Phil's book " Self Matters" made a difference for me. I learned that I was playing the tape recorded message my parenst gave me growing up over and over in my mind.. listening to them and doing what was expected of me.

My mother told me i was worhtless and would never amount to anything.. that I should never have been born... I believed her... my father taught me that if I didn't look like a Playboy pinup, I was not worth anything, let alone a decent man to love me; I would have nothign to offer.. I believed him too..

As long as I allowed those messages to replay in my head, i was unable to do anything except make it all true ya know? Am I making sense? Sometimes I am not sure I am getting the words out to express the thougths properly.

I still struggle with my self confidence ... but have been working on reinventing myself according to what I believe to be true.. and what they told me was lies... all lies..

You can get take control of your life and be whatever you want to be.. just stop listening to everything your mom ever said to you.. stop believing her lies about you...

I hope things get better for ya hun!!You can do this!