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Old May 13, 2004, 10:25 PM
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dexter dexter is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Dec 2003
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 3,133
I'm just really in turmoil... did good stuff today but I feel really really crappy, and I spend a lot of everyday now sort of "detached" trying to figure out if I feel good or if I feel bad... which I believe is a silly thing to do (I should just feel what I feel, but somehow I can't tell) and am I in really way too deep or will things get better before they get worse?

Did good stuff today but I think bottom line although I feel as if things are starting to improve there is still at least one HUGE trigger to my depression, maybe two, that I just can't get past, and I'm stuck here with them, and I don't know where to go or which way. Like the proverbial "choose between these doors, one leads to freedom, one leads to a man-eating tiger" and it's not so bad to choose I just can't make a decision.

I'm going to try to get to bed earlier today. I'm really achy too I think from moving stuff around yesterday, that's certainly not helping.

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