Thanks for the advice. For me, especially, it is difficult to form close friendships. I even recall when I was vey young, and aunt telling me of her observations that I am very selective with my choice of friends whereas one of my brothers is best friends with everyone. Another problem right now is that I am unwilling to give up time with my best friend to pursue other friendships that may or may not grow to something deeper. It's OK if I pursue others during times I would not spend with him. The other issue is where I am in life right now. It is, of course, much easier in college, for example to form many freindships.

I've actually taken your advice recently. I guess I failed to memtioned that this has been an issue for me for a few months now. Actually there was only the one negative thought - that I feel he does not care for me as much as others when I see him hugging them. The actual cases where he has demonstrated that he cares a lot became too long to list.

I know that writing it out has helped somewhat in additon to talking to him, since initially I even missed work a few days because I just wanted to sleep all the time. At least I can fuction somewhat daily now. However it is obvioulsy an issue since I have sought out this website.

I've been open with him in regards to everything but the general same sex attraction issue (though he must have some suspicion since he's known me to only go on two dates as a result of peer pressure in 20 years). I mentioned the same sex attraction on this forum because that has a lot to do with the severe loneliness that I suffer with.