Can you sit and have a discussion with your wife about her expectations and what you are going through? Why she feels that your use is causing so many problems? She may be seeing other things or having feelings about your use that she hasn't talked about yet. Try to negotiate your priorities and compromises. For example, that if you continue to use that you do not do it near her or the baby etc. and ensure that you talk to your doctors when your symptoms become bad and not just rely on the pot. Things that allow you to take the time you need while making her feel secure.

I would try talking to your pdoc as well if you are still struggling. It can take a long time to find the right medications and doses but they can be very beneficial.

I'm sorry that you feel like you have to be perfect - it can be very hard for people who haven't struggled to understand that it isn't that easy to just change and stop things. Hang in there though - it takes a lot of work and communication but it is often possible to work through.