Quote:
Originally Posted by Asiablue
Until you've experienced "good enough mothering" from someone, whether that's your own mother or a Therapist, until you've been allowed to grow up under the protective eye of a good enough mother, then that black hole inside can never be filled. And if you don't find someone willing to be that good enough mother then you are doomed. Looks like i might be doomed.
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I don't believe this, either from my own personal experience or anything I've read about healing. On the contrary, the things I'm familiar with about healing or transformation or whatever label you want to put on it are very clear, that you can fill that "black hole" by consciously chosen, deliberate changes that you make in yourself and your life.
It does resonate with me, though, that sense of being doomed, forever damaged and broken, feeling like I had to have someone else do the magic for me and once they did, everything would be different. It's a way of thinking that gave me permission to take a back seat to my own life, and kept me from many years of peaceful, contented living. For me, it's just not about what anyone else does or fails to do. It's about what I do for myself, what I create through my mindful and deliberate choices towards the life I want and the way I want to be.
That's just my experience.