Syra... in the united states of america we have many small towns. some so small for example the school nurse is also the therapist, psychiatrist, trusted member of the community and yes friends of everyone in the town...hard not to be a friend of everyone when they are the one that delivered every baby in the town...

here in america we also have the freedoms of choice... that freedom can come in many ways in which other locations and countries may think is strange and hard to comprehend.. for example I just read an article this morning about a girl in iceland who's mother and she both had to fight the childs whole life just so that the girl can have her own identity...in iceland when someone has a baby the baby can only be named from a government approved list of baby names. this parent named her child a name that could fit for both girls and boys that was not on the approved list of baby names... now to me that is such a mind boggling idea that a government says what a parent could name their child when here in america a parent can name theeir child anything and I mean anything..

well here in america even each state government, agency and profession with in america has the right to make their own choices / rules. in the profession of psychotherapy theres three different set of choices/rules of ethics... theres the national ones, then theres the state ones and then theres what each agency has decided is best for therapist-client relationships.

the nationwide government who over sees mental health rules is the american psychiatric association. they say its best that a client and therapist not be friends during the time that the client is in therapy but they also understand that america is a nation of freedom so they also allow each state to set their own rules and government that over sees mental health issues.

on the individual state level the overseeing governement is called the state board.. each state has their own panel of people that choose what the mental health standards are going to be in that state. the board is called by many names. Here in New York the mental health ethics are that a therapist and client can be friends after 2 years in which the therapist and client have ended therapy sessions with each other.

I have a client who came from another USA state whos mental health ethics are they the client and therapist cant be friends until after one year in which they haven't met for therapy purposes.

I also have a friend who came from another USA state in which that states mental health ethics stated they can be friends even while the therapist and client are in therapy together ...as long as the friendship does not hinder the therapy process, and their sessions are observed by the therapists supervisor to ensure the friendship isnt interfering with the therapeutic process.

I know there are some USA state ethics boards that say absolutely no friendship can happen between therapist and client. not before, during or after they are client therapist.

now about the going to dinner, moving in with the therapist and all that stuff...again sometimes the towns are so small that a ...barter system.... works. a barter system is where instead of money changing hands services changes hands this person will fix your car if you fix their roof, that person will sit and take care of your elderly relative if you will provide what ever service you can. one time I provided therapy for a client of mine who had no money and they used their craft abilities to make me a hand crafted quilt.

here at the crisis center our agency allows us to meet our clients in other places besides here in the office.. we get calls from the hospital on rape victims that need our help so we go to the hospital. sometimes a client will be working and something will come up and they call and ask if we can meet them someplace close to their job, sometimes people dont have transportation so we meet where ever they are able to get to, sometimes I have held sessions in diners, fast food places and even resteraunts. my own therapist has a private practice which is in her home and in a small office building. sometimes we do meet in her home and have a meal together while we are talking. I have also gone out to dinner with my therapist. one time when my finaincial aid hadnt come in yet my therapist hired me as a house keeper...clean her house once a week and I got therapy free.

my point is each location has their own rules of what is ok to do in therapy and what isnt. and each therapist and client goes according to how things are in their own locations. just like you go according to whats allowed in your location....you can find out what the choices/rules / boundaries are in yours and your treatment providers relationship by asking them whats allowed and what isnt.