I look at "regulating emotions" as 1) understanding what is making us mad or sad or stressed or whatever and then being able to work on those instigators if they are unhealthy. 2) allowing the feelings to come without feeling bad that we have feelings or feel that we have to hide them or whatever. 3) to learn to not get overwhelmed because we have feelings - Being able to tolerate that we are mad or sad or stressed. 4) working on the past stuff so that we can empty out that emotional bucket.