I was supposed to have a brief phone session with T this morning. She offered it when she didn't have any openings this week. I've been struggling a bit lately, and just thought more contact might be helpful right now.

So, I called T right as scheduled, and she answered, and said that she's really sorry, but she's right in the middle of dealing with a huge emergency involving police. She said she was just about to text me that we'll have to reschedule. I said that's fine, and for her to just call me later when she's free. She promised to call me later today.

NOW, I've got two things going on. First, the insatiable curiosity...what the heck is she having to deal with??!! I'm assuming a client, because if it were family, she wouldn't offer to call me back later, she'd be with her family. I know it's none of my business, but the curiosity is burning. Second, I feel like I'm not really worth her time. I'm not having an emergency. I just needed a little more support. But I don't want to bother her later today, knowing that she's had to deal with some major emergency already today. Plus, I feel bad for calling her this morning, even though it was planned, and she knew I'd be calling, and there was no way I could know that she'd be involved in something. I'm so tempted to text her back and tell her not to bother calling me later, that I'll manage fine until our appointment next week. Of course, I'd really like to do more than just "manage fine" cuz that's what I always do, and T is slowly starting to convince me that I deserve more than that.

I'm all conflicted!!! Do I text T and tell her to just not bother to call me back? I bet she'd ignore it if I did, and call me anyway, especially after the email I sent her earlier this week. Of course, now, I'll be sitting around all day, waiting until T calls me, and that's nice and stressful in itself.