And with the guys... Ex once when we already weren't living together sent me a YT video. In Russian. Very funny and smart. About a gal who goes to her corporate Christmas party, drinks wildly, sit on her male boss' lap, does other wild things, while her gf/colleague videotapes everything on her phone without the gal's knowledge and... posts to YT, without the gal's consent. 1 million visitors just for the month of January. The gal cannot handle the love of the masses and moves to Arctica where there is no YT. During this wild party it seemed to her that every guy in the room was in love with her.

Ex sent it to me saying that it is a perfect description of bp, complete with overabundant alcohol and thinking that every guy in the room is in love with you.

I told him that it had never happened to me. In fact, the only time this issue came up was when Lana, my gf, told me during a cozy non-alcoholic (minimum wine, that is, and nothing else) party in my apartment "Is every guy in love with you here?" There were probably five young men, our friends, and yes, eventually I would go on to have a r/s with one, a marriage with another, and just close friendships without intimate r/s with the rest. But possibly friendships without intimate r/s were sort of intentional - they could have gone a more intimate way if we did not resist it. So OK. But it was not my thought. It was her observation. And at that time it took me by surprise. I did not expect it.

So I told it to ex. He said "when somebody is manic, her mania can permeate the thinking of other people around her. In the end it is the same thing"

wtf?

And now I am looking through my life history and not seeing any place where I would have been under the impression that every guy in the room was in love with me. Ever. Several, but not all. I was always in touch with reality on that matter. Back in elementary school - went to first grade, the class was huge - more than 40 pupils, so more than 20 boys. 4 boys told me that they were in love with me. I liked that (although I did not reciprocate at that time to anybody). But I realized that the other 16+ boys were NOT in love with me. And it did not bother me. I was not like, grandiose and craving attention from every single boy or being under the illusion that every single boy was in love with me. I was perfectly satisfied and happy with the 4 I had.

The exact number has gone up or down throughout the times, but I have never thought that I was the center of attention of everybody in the room.