Well you're making a start by looking for help. Good for you on that, it may not have been easy for you to reach out like you just have.

I know it's going to be scary for you, but a therapist or psychiatrist could actually really help you figure this stuff out. Most of us go to one. You deserve some relief, and there is help out there.

Welcome to pc, feel free to practice by talking to us. We're real people and here to get help and help each other. Take care.