Thanks everyone for answering. I already see a pdoc, but some things are hard to bring up. Sometimes I wonder if I "want" or "need" to be broken, if that makes sense. I mean how can someone have as many mental problems as me and still function. In fact I think I function really well. I've been doing this since 12, and sometimes I think I want to have an ED. I know off the wall crazy crap. My symptoms are real, but one of the reasons I don't want help is because I have a feeling I will feed off of it. Yeah I know I am backwards, seeking help is suppose to help you learn new habits and cope with things you can't seem to control, but... I have no clue what I am trying to say. All I know is that I am about to fall asleep. Usually I can't sleep. Anyway, today not only did I eat pizza, I ate WAY too much. So now I feel horrible about that. I hate to see the scale more the wrong way. Anyway, again thanks for the help... and sorry if I am not making sense.

*going to bed*

Sabrina