I like and identify with that point of view, CantExplain. I don't think two people will have shared the exact same life experiences - and to be honest, if my T would say "yes, a parent did the same thing to me in the same situation" I would be a bit uncomfortable. I would feel that I would be expected to react like T had reacted, I'd feel like a failure because T had obviously handled it much better (seeing as how he is functional and successful) and I would be wary of talking about it because I wouldn't know if T was reliving his experiences. Maybe I would be able to get past that with T's help, but I don't think that I would personally find it helpful - because again, everybody's experience is different, so I wouldn't feel that T understood me better because of that.

However, getting a doctorate is one life experience I'm grateful that my T shares. He has a MD (in psychiatry), not a PhD, but the relevant thing for me is that he knows about academia and can relate to my work situation, which is a very big part of my life. And he has a very academic communicative style - and that makes it feel as if he understands me.