Thread: Help!
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Old Oct 02, 2006, 06:29 PM
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FNCrazy FNCrazy is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2006
Location: 127.0.0.1
Posts: 73
I've come to the realization that my wife of two years (dating for 5) and I are no longer "in love." Well, I've come to the realization that I am not, but all signs point to her being in the same spot. What complicates matters is that I have a son who's a year and a half, and is amazing. The thought of not seeing him every day breaks my heart!

In the 5 years, our sex life has steadily gotten less and less, to the point where the last six months have been basically roommates. Not just sex, but any intimacy. She just says it's not in her nature, and points to her mom (who's the same way) as proof.

Also, the only real thing I like about myself is my sense of humor and my parenting skills. She flat out doesn't like (or get) my sense of humor. There's just nothing there. It's like she decided she is ONLY a mom now, and nothing else. I want to grow as a person, try to overcome these social anxieties, and she wants to be a couch potato.

Will do marriage counseling, but here are my problems.

Marriage counselor wants me to wait six months before making a decision. In my brain, 8 minutes is six months. The thought of waiting six months is incomprehensible, even though rationally it's a perfectly logical thing to do.

Part of what's pushing this is that there's this woman at work that is completely in to me. She's really great, and a lot of fun. There's a spark there that I don't think I ever had with my wife. Let's just put it this way, i'm not one that usually gets to pick and choose which ones I go for.

I'm going to hell for that one, I know, but it's been SO long since anyone has shown interest in me. It makes me feel alive.

Unfortunately, it makes me realize that my marriage is missing key elements for my long term happiness. What's sad is that the thought of not seeing my son almost makes me want to deal with the unhappiness just so i'm not apart from him ever.

Did I mention one of my biggest fears is being alone? How do I divorce my wife, have my son half time, and deal with all those issues at the same time i'm dealing with panic disorders, GAD, everything else?

Thanks for listening.
__________________
After 38 years together, it is with great sorrow that I announce that reality and I have filed for divorce due to irreconcilable differences.

We tried to make it work, but we just have different views on the world, different goals, and plus, between you and me, reality is crazy and refuses to take it's meds.

DX: BP2, GAD, ADHD, PTSD (Probably other acronyms)