A harsh but pretty accurate assessment. There's a reason why for the most part, self defense doesn't teach much in the way of strikes. Real fights (not brawls) often come down to some kind kind of clinch or grappling, that's why knowing how to break free of that and running is the most useful tool.

The problem with being armed is that it's not a universally useful tool. Most countries don't allow for that luxury. Once again, the best tool at your disposal is your mind and your body in conjunction with it, and it's the whole idea of prevention rather than combative action. And as you pointed out, it's hard to know how to react properly, which is a huge part of what self defense training is suppose to teach you. A real self defense course will teach you how to react under stress, pressure and sometimes pain. A useless self defense class will try to teach you gimmicky but useless moves.

I'll disagree on your last point. If someone is well trained enough, male or female, the size and toughness of the opposition won't matter much. Someone who's properly trained at a useful martial art or in combative form would have more than a chance, but such women are uncommon.