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Feb 06, 2013, 09:39 AM
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Member Since: Dec 2012
Location: California
Posts: 2,248
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TheRealFDeal
I feel ya, button. I have my doubts. Having been terminated by my T after he repeatedly told me he would not abandon me, I don't know how I'm ever going to trust another.
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Same thing happened to me. Even the same words - she hasn't abandoned me - as she calls for a break and later sends a letter that essentially says it's over without even saying that in so many words - and never contacting me despite several opportunities and not even able to say hello when she passed me in the hallway. I think she told me she hadn't abandoned me to convince herself more than me)
But I was able to engage and trust the next therapist. For me, I don't think anyone can be totally trustworthy. Not even me. All people have triggers and inconsistencies, or just plain make mistakes out of good will, and looking for someone you KNOW you can trust is a very long journey. On the other hand, I choose to trust several people. My husband, my current therapist, some friends. I don't choose to trust some other people. Sometimes I have been hurt by trusting (most notably, my former therapist: ) but trusting (carefully selected) people who are probably safe to trust with things I need to discuss with someone seems preferable to me than not trusting anyone and having no one to share my struggles with. I know that by living a life of trusting others I will get hurt, but I think I get hurt a lot less than by having nobody I trust even when I sometimes get hurt by that.
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