I've experienced the Stigma aspect of which all of you are talking about. people talking about me behind my back, not trusting my decisions, people expecting me to do things or just not understanding why i do some things and not others.I sounds like you have no control in your life because of your mother. People do come and go as i've found out once they found out you are having problems, It's nobody's business about you helping your mom out and if they think you're so bad to being watching over her ask them if they would ever do such things for their own family members.