So lately I've reached a new kind of low that is rather unsettling for me. And this low is a result of an "epiphany" I had, which was: I have no future.

Maybe that sounds really dumb and cliche as far as depression goes, but I really do have some--or at least what I believe to be--really strong evidence for that statement.

I guess I'm unsure of what I'm asking. I've done therapy--a lot of therapy--and taken all the medications and studied up on all the modern psychobabble but it has never seemed to work or have any lasting effects (besides weight gain!).

I guess I would just really appreciate a few friendly words, since I don't really have anyone to turn to in real life about my mental illness. I'm tired of being "OK." I'm not OK. I'm actually really, really sad. And I don't know how long I can tough it out before I do something.

Thanks for reading...