raz, hon, you are not a lost cause, that's jsut what you feel like right now. one relationship ending is not the end of the world forever. i'm sorry you are feeling so bad right now. it must hurt to think your illnesses did the relationship in. it takes very special people to hook up on a one to one with us folks. but many here have found that special someone. endings are beginnings as well. leave the door to your heart cracked open for when a goody happens by someday. in the meantime, cut yourself some slack, please. being a crazy cripple is the pits, but, you are such a nice person. no more negative self talk (after you're done venting), ok? )))))))) ) ) ) razeljenny (((((((( ( (