I like to think that I am a strong guy. a tough guy even. but that's all fake. a front. teh reality is that my emotions are fragile and run out of control easily. not much of a man i turned out to be. boo hoo for me over teh slightest debate.

whining on and on. I should just shut the **** up already! I am so sick of me... so sick of feeling this way.... of being out of control...

I can't control it either. It's not like I can flip the switch and change. I am stuck being this person that I hate. it's always been like this. and when I do change it, it's ****ing fake. this is who i am. this is why i never amounted to much. and prolly never will. just a whiney little ***** cuz i cant' control my emotinos and moods. **** this life.