I don't feel i have much future, currently I am waiting on a decision as to whether I can get on SSI or if I have to try and appeal a denial. But that's not really much to look forward to sure it would be a bit of income but its not like it doesn't come with stigma that stresses me out.

I've failed college twice, couldn't even handle a part time job I tried out when I was 17 which made me feel like crap since everyone else my age seemed to have a part time job and money to go out and have fun. Then there was the temporary job I failed at as well a couple years ago. I feel like I get to look forward to more frustration from dealing with mental health services, more psych ward visits though having been to one once now not so sure I'd be able to convince myself to go willingly again even if I was that concerned. But I try not to let the hopelessness of the situation get to me but I don't think I am doing to great of a job.

I don't really have much helpful to say, but I sort of know the feeling and how much it can suck.