I understand some of what you're going through. I say it that way because I don't know you're history or anything else about you(could have worded that better), and it's impossible to know someone else experiences anyway.
But...
I have littles that have a real effect on my emotional state. meaning they're miserable, I'm miserable, and so on. Especially if they are close. And carry memories of unpleasant things.
You may want to consider if you need those memories....
Sometimes digging just hurts...
Just a thought. If you gotta, then you gotta. But if you don't...

Jax