Thank-you Bipolar Bear, Myself, Sky and Anne for your post. I really do appreciate your concern and thoughts on this. I did some research (right now forgeting exactly where) but from what I read it did say that stress can cause your alters to come back......someone who was DID can have a relapse just as easy as an alcohoic. I though once I intergrated I would be done with this. I did the next day get up again in the middle of the nite and drew out a system. I did not know this till the next morning. Not all of the alters are back but mainly the ones who use to help with things. One though is an alter who use to act out quite a bit. I am nervous about him. I just don't want to have to deal with those issues......again. I am trying to do alot of "self-care" and grounding like use to. It is so hard because I feel like I have been just tossed aside. My wife, we are living separate now...told me yesterday that some guy she has known for over a year now is coming here to michigan to spend time with her and meet her parents till the end of december! I feel like its oh yes I am finished with you I will move on to someone else now. I trusted her......I confided in her...she knows things about my abuse that no one else even knows. I feel very betrayed. I must of been in la la land to not even know this was all going on. I just thought she was worried about hearing if she got in the nursing program where they only take 30 students twice a year and something like over 200 applied.....I was just too stupid I guess. I don't know if I will ever beable to trust again. I feel like my insides have came to an alert, have closed in closer, and are
stancing to protect. All the while I am trying to concentrate on my classes that just started and take care of my moother who informed me yesterday out of the blue that my youngest sister is her favorite! I mean she is 80 so I know she might say things just out of the blue without thinking but that really hurt too.....I have the erge to go color now!!!! and I need to study.

Thanks anyway for your posts.

Tobey