Sometimes it is unbearable. Depression robs us of hope and makes us feel like we don't matter what and everything is pointless. You have to stay strong and keep hanging in there. Keep working with your doctors. I try and soround myself with people that love and care about me. That way even when I feel miserable and I can't seem to go on, I know there are people that care and love me. I find strength in that. I hope you start to feel better soon.