I am very sorry you are having to deal with your husband's bad behavior. I would leave; sounds like too much for one to put up with, especially since it sounds like he is not trying to change or make the relationship work.

Protect your own assets and get out of the house into something you can afford on your own. Get to a lawyer and figure out how to protect yourself from his selfishness.

I would say it is unlikely he is going to get disability as he is young and has worked well until recently and it does not sound like he is in therapy or has a doctor to document his illness. He does not get to declare himself disabled, he has to be shown by doctors to be disabled and it would probably take him several tries and many months to get that designation, if he were to get it, due to his former lifestyle.