When I ground myself it is usually because one of my alters is emotional. And they are locked in a particular emotional state. This is how they represent all the time. I have many fragmented alters that seem to be made up of emotion. If they have a memory that goes along with their emotion I am unaware of it. So John is fearful when he is out. John does not present in any other way. It is not like John will ever pop out laughing. If John is out than what is being felt is fear. So if I ground myself to relieve me of the feeling of fear, John goes back in and I come out. But that prevents John from talking to my t. I can repeat things that he wants to say but if he wants to talk to my t than fear is what we will be feeling.
So when my t asks me to contain the powerful emotions of the little girl while allowing her to say what she wants to say, I can't think of a way to do that. If I ground myself she will go back in. I don't know how she can exist separate from her emotions sense that is her reason for being. I think I need to take more time to get to know her. She seems to want very much to talk to my t. But I think she and I need to figure out a way for her to say what she want to say without me being consumed by the emotions attached to her memory.