((H3rmit))
I'm sorry that you're feeling so depressed.
Have you spoken with your doctor about your low mood? In my opnion, you should start there. My guess is that he/she will prescribe an anti-depressant and recommend seeing a therapist. Both are good ideas at this point.
It sounds like talking with a T might be real helpful to you ~ working through issues that haunt you as well as coming up with new ways to work through daily stress.
Gentle hugs to you...