Maranara,
Try getting the book, "Trama and Recovery" by Judith Herman and read through it.
If you can't have a T for a while then you have to look for other ways to "self help".
So reading would be a good way to have "new suggestions" come into your mind.

You have identified some of your challenges here, so that is a start. You can work on knowing these challenges present themselves to you, so you have to make decisions about developing better ways to manage yourself and "not allow yourself to think you have to follow along with these troubling thoughts just because they come up".

I see a therapist Maranara, but he keeps me to task as "I" learn to do the work to help myself "heal".
A therapist doesn't fix someone, they "help" and support and guide patients to learn how to do what they need to do to heal and take over controling their challenges.

(((HUGS)))