I realize that they have ethical codes and other reasons for checking this out. I said that at the two meetings I've already attended.

Still it feels very invasive. I just got out of session where my analyst said that he thought the relationship was "sacred" and wouldn't allow the institution to impinge upon that. While he is willing to talk about the strange effects of Ambien and how this was out of character, he is more reluctant to comply with any potential "reporting" that he might have to do to the university. He has his own ethical codes and concerns to uphold as well.

So I don't know what will happen if they set up some sort of "plan" that requires me to "show progress" when for one thing this was a one time event and now it's over. And for another my analyst doesn't feel it's right to have to break my confidentiality and privacy when there isn't a crisis situation which is the only lawful reason to do so.

Unfortunately the other problem is that the way the incident is happening is replicating aspects of trauma that I've experienced so I'm having to fight against letting that get to me. I was betrayed by this supposed friend at school, who didn't have to report on me since I had handled it well and professionally already. I'm still in classes with her so I have to take extra effort to make sure that I don't act any differently.

I can't wait until this situation is over. The last two days I was so absorbed with this that I was unable to do any of my school work, just curled up in bed, wrote in my journal, and tried to sleep when I could. I can't keep doing that. I have too much to take care of and don't want to get depressed either.