How can a person be 50 years old, have 2 grown sons, be married (26 years), have a grandbaby on the way, have stable employment, be on multiple psych meds, and.......totally give up hope?

This is nothing new. I've been in this state of depression and hopelessness for years, and I've basically been living until my youngest son graduates from high school. Well, he graduates in May, and I just feel like it's all over.

I've talked about this with tdoc, and he suggested that as soon as my son graduates, I need to go inpatient. I won't let that happen.

Tdoc also pointed out that we have different goals: his is life and mine is death, and he threatened to stop seeing me. I know this sounds crazy to most people, but I really do not understand how to change my goal.

Sorry to dump on you here.