i had this volleyball game earlier today, and my arms are very badly sliced up. I can still hit the ball with no real bad pain, but my team mates keep asking me what happened...i cant tell them because then it will get around the school that i cut myself, and i have enough labels already. Anyways, after my game, the coach pulled me aside, he said that he knows about my past and what i have been through, i guess he noticed my arms when we were in the huddle. He told me that if i ever need to tell or report something, that i can go to him and he will take care of it or he will just listen. Its nice to know someone notices my cuts and slices, and then actually wants to help, instead of labeling, but im still sick of making up stories. I want people to know why i do this and understand that im addicted to it, and most of the time i really regret it. But i know i cant convince every person i know. I guess im kind of worried now, because if my coach sees that i am hurting and what i do to myself, then maybe other people can too. I know one of my teachers noticed...but i ussually dont get along with my teachers, so she didnt say anything. I know im blabbing on and on...sorry. Im just so paranoid that people are going to find out who i really am....and thats not always a good thing
Anyways thanx for letting me just vent.
-Megan-