Yes, cutting because you are angry at someone is a coping mechanism. There are three ways to handle anger at someone. The first way is to strike back, either yelling at them or physically assaulting them. The second is by turning your anger inward. That produces depression, cutting and low self esteem. The third way is the most healthy. Calmly and rationally confront the person, tell them what they did to anger you and try and work things out.

Obviously the third is the hardest, and unfortunately takes two people acting like adults. People who choose the third route realize that reagardless of what the other person says or does, they need to stay calm and rational. That is extremely difficult sometimes, so there is always the choice of just walking away and letting the other person have thier tantrum.

If you think about it, cutting yourself is about the same as going after the person you are angry at. Someone is getting hurt. Let me ask you this. If the person in question made you mad, would you pick up a razor, knife or something hot and assault that person? If the answer is no, then why do it to yourself?

You're question just isn't that simplistic. We all know that in our society, assaulting another person is likely to land you in jail. It is also a taboo, and most of us won't cross that line unless they are physically attacked or someone they love is. Instead, we go after ourselves because we have morals and ethics and don't really want to hurt someone else. We like to fantasize about what we would like to do to that person, (which is actually a lot better than going after ourselves), but few of us would follow through. If we did, life would be chaos.

Seeking help for self harm is difficult, I know. You may be embarrassed or ashamed or just plain scared, but cutting is truly a cry for help. Please don't be embarrassed by your SH or ashamed. You are ill, and emotional illness every bit as painful as a physical ailment. What you say to a therapist stays between the therapist and yourself. You control the sessions and decide what you do and don't want to say. The therapist is there to gently guide you towards a better way of dealing with your anger or any other trigger for cutting. Please do get help though. The longer you let this go, the more difficult it will be to get help. We as a species have a great capacity for denial, and are quick to use it when we fear something. Let us know how you are doing.

Sam2