Thinking of you, skittles. You do need to be honest with your doc. I'm going today, too, & have much of the same feelings you do. Some docs have wanted me to go to the hospital, but I've refused after seeing my mother in mental institutions. I know they've changed a lot, but it would make me feel that I'm as bad off or as severe as she was & I couldn't face that. I have done outpatient treatment, though.

Hope you get some relief soon. Take care.--Suzy