AAAAA you are so right. I used to think it was a control thing that my H wanted me in bed the same time he was in bed. I'm still not so sure about that. He does have alot of control issues and this was just another to add to that list. But I do think it was and is more about the connection.

My H is self employeed and is in construction. I totally get what you mean by arguing in his sleep. My H has asked me some of the silliest things about work and argued w/ me about his work like I was an employee.

For me I suppose it is not wanting that connection, not wanting another argument, no wanting ugly words as he goes to sleep and I'm left to drive my self crazy w/ the rude things he has to say. But that is just me and I'm not sure that is the cause for everyone not sleeping in the same bed.